Reckless, p.6
Reckless, page 6
A soft knock on the office door makes me look up.
“I’m packed and ready to go, son.”
The sight of my mother dressed for the airport shoots a bolt of fear through me.
She starts talking like it’s not a big deal she’s going to another state. “I told Tori where to find Cody’s hiding places. How to get the kids to brush their teeth. Where the emergency numbers are. Their daily schedule. Everything’s gonna be fine.”
I was never a momma’s boy growing up. That was Logan. But I’ll admit I’m a little torn up seeing her go. Probably ’cause we relied so heavily on each other after my father died.
We head into the living room where Tori is on the floor, dressed like a princess, compliments of my daughter’s styling efforts. Cody is hanging off Tori’s neck, and Mila is debating which bauble would look best on her new babysitter.
“Give your grandma a hug goodbye.” I motion for the kids to get up.
Mila takes one look at my mother, sees the suitcase behind her, and immediately starts bawling. Rushing into her grandmother’s arms, she cries so hard, she starts hiccupping.
Mom coos in her ear. “Honey, calm down. I’m only going for a month or two. I’ll be back soon.”
“But wha-wha-what if you don’t come back? Wha-wha-what if you stay away like Mommy? What if you don’t want us anymore?”
I close my eyes, my daughter’s words a cattle brand on my heart.
Does this ever get easier?
“Sweetie, I’m always, always gonna want you and your brother, and your momma wants you guys too.” Her voice is thick with emotion. “She’s just going through a rough time is all.” Smoothing down my daughter’s hair, my mom whispers, “I’m only a phone call away. Call me any time, night or day.” She pulls out of my daughter’s hug and holds her shoulders. “Hey, look at me.” Mila’s tear-stricken face cuts me to the core. “I need you to be a big girl and take care of your daddy and brother. Two men in a house by themselves need a good woman to look after them.”
Mila nods and wipes away snot. “I can make Daddy Pop Tarts for breakfast so he’s not hungry.”
“Thatta girl. And you remember how he likes his coffee, right? Two sugars and a good helping of milk. Don’t use half-and half even though he likes it because he should watch those trans fats now while he’s young.”
Hearing the two most important girls in my life worry about me makes my chest ache.
I’m wondering how I’m gonna get Mila out of my mom’s arms when Tori approaches them and whispers in Mila’s ear. Not sure what she says, but Mila starts laughing, and Tori picks her up and swings her around so she’s on her back, clinging to her neck.
“Have a great trip, Beverly,” Tori says cheerfully, like my whole family isn’t on the brink of an apocalypse. “Mila and I are going to have a big surprise for you when you get back, aren’t we, Mila?”
My daughter wipes her eyes and nods and smiles at my mom. “Big, big, big surprise!”
I stand there, a little dumbfounded that this train wreck has turned around, until Tori mouths, “It’s okay. Go.” She turns her back so she and Mila are facing the other way.
As I’m walking my mom out, I pause in the doorway to look at my kids, who are playing with Tori like nothing happened.
Only one thought comes to mind—thank God she’s here.
* * *
It’s dark when I get back, much later than I thought I’d be. Austin traffic sucked, as always, and Mom’s flight was delayed. That was when I realized I didn’t have Tori’s cell number, and she didn’t have mine. I was thinking I was the worst parent ever when I remembered my mom had shown Tori the emergency numbers.
My brother’s sprawled on a couch, flipping through baseball channels, when I stride into the house.
“Thanks for coming over.”
When I realized I couldn’t call Tori’s cell and she wasn’t picking up the office phone—why would she?—I called Logan and asked him to check on the kids and let Tori know I was running late.
“No problemo. Wasn’t like I had plans.” His brow lifts meaningfully.
“On a Monday night?”
“Yeah, with this hot-as-fuck waitress I met last week. Thanks for cockblocking, by the way.”
I roll my eyes. God forbid my brother doesn’t get laid regularly.
He waves the remote in my direction without taking his eyes off the TV. “Do you need Joey to babysit for you this weekend? She says to call or text if you do.”
“Yeah, I might need an extra pair of hands.” I told Tori she could have the weekends off, and I don’t want to break that promise.
Joey is my brother’s best friend. She’s a couple of years younger than Logan and has helped my mom with the kids once or twice, but the girl has her hands full at home. Even though I thought to ask her about babysitting full-time, I know she’d never be able to.
“Where is everyone?” The house is quiet. Too quiet.
“Asleep, I guess.”
“Tori got Mila and Cody to bed?”
“Yuuuuup.” He keeps clicking channels. “No thanks required, bro. Don’t even mention how I found a Disney princess to be your nanny. I don’t need a pat on the back or anything.”
I roll my eyes and kick off my boots so my shoes don’t wake up the kids.
If Tori were a princess, she’d definitely be Ariel the Mermaid. Only with thick, brown hair and a rounder, bitable ass.
The back hallway is dark, and I tiptoe into Cody’s room. Sure enough, he’s nestled in bed and zonked out to the world.
Leaning down to give him a kiss, I realize Tori must’ve given him a bath because he smells like clean little boy instead of the stinker I handed her this afternoon. I check the kids’ bathroom, certain it must look like a hurricane blew through it because my kidlets are hellions in the tub, but everything is neat and clean.
I’m half-ready to thank my lucky stars for our new nanny when I get to Mila’s room and find her bed empty.
Panic builds in my gut as I fly down the hall to Tori’s room. The door is open and the bedside lamp is on, and there, in the middle of the bed, are Tori and Mila, curled up on the comforter, sound asleep, with a copy of Bedtime for Francis next to them.
Seeing my daughter, safe and sound, makes me feel foolish for freaking out.
Reaching down to scoop up Mila, I gently move Tori’s arm, and her lids flutter open.
“Hey,” she whispers.
I hold up one finger to tell her to hang on while I pick up my daughter. Mila’s like a sack of potatoes in my arms. After I tuck her into her own bed, I stop back in Tori’s doorway.
My eyes widen when I realize how intimate this is. Tori on her bed in a tiny black tank top and sleep shorts. Her gorgeous hair tumbling over her shoulders. The quiet house and soft lighting.
Taking a step back, I look away to give her some privacy.
“Did they wear you out?” I ask, realizing she must be as tired as my kids. “Sorry I woke you. Didn’t think you’d want Mila kicking your face in the middle of the night. She sleeps like a starfish.”
“No worries,” she says as she yawns. “I tried to follow your mom’s directions on that sheet. Got them fed and bathed and in bed on time, but I have to confess they ate pizza for dinner with nary a vegetable in sight.”
I chuckle and pull off my baseball cap to push my hair back. Reversing the bill, I pull the hat on backwards. “If that’s the worst crime, I think you did as well as I could’ve.” It’s true. Given how upset Mila was this afternoon, the fact that the rest of the day went smoothly is nothing short of a miracle. “Thanks for taking care of dinner and their bedtime routine. Usually, I can do that so you have your evenings free.”
Thinking back to my crisis earlier today and not being able to reach her, I tap on her doorframe. “Before I forget, I need your cell number.”
Her lips tug up in one corner as she stretches like a cat. “No sexting, remember?”
My eyes shoot up to hers. At first, I can’t tell if she’s joking or if she really thinks I’m the dick who sends out, well, pics of my dick. Or dirty messages. Can’t say I’ve ever done either of those with a girl, even in college. Would Allison have been into that sort of thing? Hell, I never thought to test those waters.
She laughs. “Just messin’ with you. But you should see the look on your face.”
She calls out her digits, and I tap out her number on my cell, shaking my head the whole time.
When I’m done, I slip my phone in my back pocket. “Ya know, you’re kind of a menace when you’re not playing Mary Poppins.”
As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I’m worried I offended her, but the smile she gives me is brilliant and wide and more than a little mischievous. “Don’t think I don’t know this.”
Shaking my head again, I start to close the door. “Night, Tasmanian Devil.”
She snickers. “Night, Wolverine.”
10
Tori
Lying in bed, I wonder why I flirted with him tonight. In the moment, I didn’t think it was that flirty. I’ve said worse things to my friends.
But Ethan isn’t a friend.
He’s my employer, and sexting is not what you discuss with an employer. I guess I am an HR nightmare.
I was half asleep, and he looked so damn cute with his baseball cap on backwards and that sweet expression he gets when he’s talking about his kids. And the way his t-shirt stretched across his broad chest, showcasing his tattoos, made my mouth water.
I can’t explain why, but I wanted to yank his chain and see how he took it.
Yank his chain. Ha. I’d definitely love to yank that.
Wait. Noooooo.
Hell, no.
I squeeze my eyes shut to get him out of my head.
I cannot get a thing for this guy. No way. Is he even divorced yet? And didn’t I throw down the gauntlet the other day with the “no sex ever” conversation? Not to mention I’m not his type.
Is there an AA meeting for this sort of thing, attraction to unavailable men? Because I definitely should look into attending.
After my breakup with Jamie, I researched a woman’s sex drive and found an interesting article that said the more you fed your libido, the more you craved sex, so I figured if I starved the damn thing, the need might disappear. Abstaining from sex sounded reasonable at the time. But now, a year into this endeavor? Now I want to be touched and cuddled and fucked until I can’t walk straight.
This is worse than that dumb carb-free fast I tried in high school, which resulted with me stuffing my face with every biscuit, muffin, and tortilla I could get my hands on for three days straight when I finally caved.
With a groan, I kick off the covers, flip on the bedside lamp, and look around my room. Most of my stuff is still in my apartment in Austin, so I don’t even have the one, no-frills vibrator I didn’t throw out last summer. If I acquaint myself with the deluxe shower head I noticed in my bathroom, will I wake everyone up?
Ugh. Not worth it.
Stay strong, Victoria.
Whimpering, I flop back on the bed and cross my arm over my face. At least when I was waiting tables and bartending, I had daily—hell, hourly—reminders of how hot guys were dirtbags. But here, stranded with Mr. Sexy-As-Fuck Farm Boy, I sense the thrill of the chase toying with my resistance, especially now that I’m seeing Ethan’s not the giant asshole I assumed he was when we first met.
I mentally flip through this last year where I really only did two things to keep my mind off Jamie—I worked and cooked. Maybe I can use that as an outlet here. Not only is cooking for the kids something I’ll enjoy, more elaborate meals wear me out, so I shouldn’t have an ounce of extra energy to lust after their dad.
The buzz of an incoming call interrupts my wallowing, but when I see the name on my cell screen, I groan. I love my best friend Vivian, but not the way we always seem to get in trouble when we’re together.
An all-girl Catholic high school did nothing to tame the two of us. If anything, it made Viv and me rebel more when we were younger, and college only made us wilder. But we haven’t hung out in ages, and I’m starting to feel guilty about it.
“Why aren’t you at my party?” she asks, without preamble. A thumping bass punctuates every other word. She must head into a quiet room, because the music fades to a low roar.
“I didn’t know you were back from South Padre.” I don’t bother explaining that some of us have to work for a living. She “works” for her father, but he’s always letting her set her own hours.
Yawning, I try to follow what she’s saying.
“Wait. Were you asleep? At nine p.m.?”
“Got a new job. Sort of.” Everything with Ethan is so up in the air, I don’t know if he really plans for me to be here the entire summer. Or if I want to be here that long. Except there’s no other way I can be as close to Kat if this doesn’t work out.
I give Viv a brief rundown of how I came to be the newest employee at Carter Cutting Horses.
“Have you fucked him yet?” She chews ice in my ear.
“Fucked who?”
“The dad. He sounds hot, and you’ve always had a thing for assholes.”
“Of course I haven’t fucked him. He’s my boss.” And he’s not really an asshole.
“Never stopped you before.”
I sigh, feeling the exhaustion of my past bulldoze over me. “I never slept with any of my bosses.” People only think I have because I run with friends like Val. Sure, I’ve had plenty of hookups, and yes, I love sex, but I have a morality clause—no bosses or guys who’ve dated my friends. As soon as you bang someone’s ex, you’re headed for crazy town, and I have enough of that in my life without chumming the water.
“Really?” She sounds disappointed.
“I swear.”
“Jamie wasn’t your boss?”
The sound of his name makes me wince. “No, he wasn’t my boss. He was my boss’s friend, which was bad enough.”
Because one, my boss Kevin never bothered to tell me my boyfriend was fucking married, and two, when Jamie and I unceremoniously broke up that fateful day, I had to quit my bartending job or face the very real possibility of seeing him because he frequented that restaurant.
And there was no way I was ever talking to that scumbag again. I changed my number, switched my job, and eventually moved when he kept stalking my place and sending me flowers. Nothing says, “Hey, sorry I didn’t tell you I was a cheating douchebag” like bouquets of carnations. Who apologizes with the cheapest flower in the state of Texas? Even after I trashed them, they left behind that sickeningly sweet scent that reminded me of my grandmother’s funeral.
“Are you still on that man diet thing?”
“No dicks for me.” Figuratively or literally.
“That’s a shame. I have a friend—”
“No.”
“He’s super hot.”
“Then you date him, and I’ll live vicariously through your escapades.”
She laughs maniacally. “No one said date him. Just let him bang your brains out so you can get over your aversion to attractive men and see that you need to move back to Austin. Then we can party the whole summer. Come on. You haven’t been the same since Jamie. Where’s the BFF I know and love?”
“Girlfriend, I have to work. I have bills to pay. Daddy ain’t gonna cover my rent.”
I can almost hear her rolling her eyes. “George doesn’t pay my rent.” She calls her parents by their first names. My mother would smack me with her chancla if I ever did that. “I have a salary, thank you very much.”
A salary Daddy pays even when you don’t show up to work.
But when she doesn’t stop badgering me, I promise to go out with her. I might need a break from Ethan Carter pronto anyway.
“Yay!” she yells into the phone. “We’ll have a blast! One night of partying never hurt anyone.”
I don’t bother pointing out how we both know that’s not true.
One night is all it takes for everything to go wrong.
* * *
When I wake up the next morning, a precious face grins at me over the edge of the bed.
“Hey, Mila.”
What time is it? Ethan didn’t specify what time he wanted me to get the kids up, only that they ate around eight, and it’s not quite seven fifteen.
“Sorry I woke you. Did I wake you?” She bounces up and down on her toes.
This kid is like sunshine on crack. I smile at her even though it pains me to be so cheerful this early in the day without a shot of coffee injected straight into my jugular.
Baby babble sounds through a tiny speaker on the bedside table. Ethan must’ve put the baby monitor there this morning before he headed out to work with the horses. Cody isn’t quite two, so of course his dad still has a monitor for him. I feel dumb for not thinking about that sooner.
“Mila, can you do me a favor and keep your brother company for a few minutes while I brush my teeth? I’ll be right out.”
“I can do that!” She leaps into action, a blur of little girl racing out the door.
My laughter turns into a groan as I try to roll out of bed. When I bartend, I usually go to bed around three or four. Sometimes later. So getting up with the cows is not something my body knows how to do. I haven’t gotten up this early since that internship fired me.
A few minutes later, when I get to Cody’s room, his big smile perks me up. These kids are so freaking happy, I don’t know what to do with myself. I grin at him and snuggle his warm body to me.
“Did you sleep well, munchkin?” He nuzzles closer. I close my eyes, loving his sweet baby scent. “Are you hungry?”
His grumbling tummy answers the question, and I hurry to get him changed so I can feed him. It takes a few minutes to wrestle him out of his pajamas, and when I get to his diaper, his smile widens.
